


I don't need you to respect me, I respect me

by lilacskiesandroses



Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, David Jacobs-centric, Fluff and Angst, Jack is a good friend/boyfriend. It can be seen as both, M/M, Trauma, mention of former abuse, mentions of self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:55:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27204862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilacskiesandroses/pseuds/lilacskiesandroses
Summary: Sometimes Davey feels like he's never going to be okay, but Jack is there for him.
Relationships: David Jacobs & Jack Kelly, David Jacobs/Jack Kelly
Kudos: 47





	I don't need you to respect me, I respect me

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this to calm myself down and I hope you like it. ALSO Davey and Jack can be read as romantic or platonic, it's up to you.   
> TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of former abuse, panic attacks, mentions of self harm. Please don't read if it makes you uncomfortable.

There’s this specific release Davey gets when he gets in his car on the way home from school and just blows his stereo out in his car. He isn't typically an angsty music guy, but when he’s upset, he is. Folk-punk blasts as he drives the 5 miles that span between his school and his house. Sarah, his twin sister, usually snags a ride from her girlfriend after school to pop by her place before Katherine drops her off at work. 

David is everything you could want out of a kid; well, he was before everything happened. He was an honor roll student, a talented music kid, a star soccer player, and worked at a non-profit that tutored kids for free. Teachers adored him; people thought he was a boy with a kind smile, and this glimmer in his eye that told you he knew and understood. If they only knew what was going on in his brain, they’d be the one hugging him instead of the other way around. 

_ “The length of my hair or the fit of my clothes,”  _ He hums along to The Front Bottoms, a band he’s recently gotten into. Davey drums his fingers along the steering wheel while at a red light. The light turns green, and he starts to go until he sees  _ him _ . Davey slams on his break, making sure his eyes aren’t seeing things. The cars behind him all honk, and he starts to drive again, but his anxiety’s now through the roof. He reaches over and turns his car volume all the way out so he can’t taste or feel his thoughts anymore. 

Davey pulls into his driveway and parks like shit, and he knows his mom will yell at him later but right now, he just needs to get into the shower. 

“Hey honey, how was-” Mrs.Jacobs is cut off as Davey drops his bag by the kitchen counter and runs up the stairs. “I’LL BE IN MY ROOM IF YOU NEED ME” she shouts at him as he slams the bathroom door closed. 

She knows he heard her because she gets a text that says ‘k. ily.’ as soon as she hears the shower starts. Mrs.Jacobs doesn’t blame him for anything that happened or how bad his anxiety gets now. The restraining order was denied, and the entire family was furious for weeks while Davey spent the whole time holed up in his room.

Davey opens Spotify, and he turns on his playlist specifically for when this happens, and he steps under the running water. It’s turning his skin red, and he knows it, but if it’s any colder, he’ll absolutely freak. There’s this feeling still running under his veins; he needs to scream, he needs to say something, but he never does. Instead, he lets the ugly sob that he’s been holding in out. He used to cover his hand with his mouth so his family wouldn’t hear how fucking broken he is, but now his music is too loud for them to hear anything besides the humming of the water pipes running. 

*** 

_ “You’re the only person holding me together, you know that? So never leave me, okay?” the boy looks up at Davey with wet, glassy eyes, and he gives in.  _

_ “Of course, kid. I’m always here for you.”  _

… 

_ “Vey, I need you. My family’s fighting again, please stay.” The hazel eyes burn into his skull, and he gives Davey a tight grin.  _

_ “I will, you know, I will.”  _

_…_

_ “David, if you leave me, I will kill myself. Please, please, please, please.” The boy is begging as the phone call crackles, and Davey needs to cover his mouth so he wouldn’t hear his sobs. _

_ “I won’t go. I’ll never leave you.”  _

*** 

Davey snaps his eyes open in the shower and lets out another choked out attempt at trying to breathe like a human again. He grabs his shampoo and starts lathering, ignoring the stinging on his legs that he’s felt since he got in. It’s fine; he’s a soccer kid, the cuts are nothing more than from skidding on the field. Everyone knows he wears long pants in the middle of summer for a reason, but they never fully address it. 

“I am okay.” He shakily says. “I am okay because I am here. I left for a reason. I got out of it. I am alive. I didn’t give in.” Davey doesn’t even know at this point who he’s trying to convince. He rinses the shampoo out of his hair right as his phone starts to ring. It keeps ringing as he combs his conditioner through his hair, and it gets sent to voicemail. 

“ _ Daves, it’s me, Jack. Your mom texted me, I’m on my way over. I love you, okay? Don’t do anything dumb. I better not have to kiss your boo-boos.”  _ Jack chuckles over the phone as Davey gives a weak smile.  _ “I’ll be there as soon as I can; I’m already in Race’s neighborhood; I love you, see you in a sec.”  _ His phone beeps and turns off. Davey reaches for his soap, eucalyptus, and mint, some stress relief bullshit that Sarah buys for him at a no-waste store, but he thinks it smells nice, and it’s a soap that works. 

He’s toweling off and pulling on a pair of grey sweatpants that are probably Jack’s from the length and how they end just above his ankle when he hears knocking. 

“Coming!” He yells over his shoulder, grabs a soft blue sweater from his wardrobe, and pulls it on blindly while running down the stairs. Davey barrels straight into Jack’s arms as soon as he aggressively flings his front door open. 

“Hey Davey-mine,” Jack says as he wraps his arms around Davey’s torso and all of Davey’s tension disappears.

“I saw him.” Davey barely manages to get out before the tears start again. 

“I know, love, I’m right here. I got you.” Jack and Mrs. Jacobs exchange a look of knowing, and he hoists Davey’s legs around his waist and shuts the front door with his foot. Jack carries Davey up to his room, where he gently lays him down on his bed. “So, is it a movie day or a car day?” 

“Get your ass over here; what do you think about cheesecake and Mexican?”Jack lets out a laugh at Davey’s response. 

“Hell yeah, movie day. You wanna continue watching ``Haunting of Hill House?” Which leads to the boys snuggling up under the covers of Davey’s queen-sized bed and his head lying on Jack’s chest. When the Jacobs moved from Manhattan to a town 30 minutes away from San Francisco, they managed to snag a 4 bedroom house during the stock market crash. It was definitely a fixer-upper, but the family did it all, and it was painted with love and laughs. 

Jack smiles into Davey’s hair as he scrolls through Door Dash for whatever local restaurant that he was currently into and, of course, the Cheesecake factory. The food was overpriced, but the cheesecake and only the cheesecake was good enough to warrant the price of getting it delivered. 

“White chocolate raspberry or red velvet?”Davey looks up at Jack to ask.

“Hmmm, both? We can share.” Jack gave him a goofy grin and kissed the top of his head.

“Fuck yeah, and I’ll order Les whatever disgusting flavor he’s currently into.”

“What is it this time?”

“Fucking  _ orange creamsicle. _ ”

“Jesus Christ, Lesley.” 

“Right?” 

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno if I'll leave this to be a one-shot or not. It's based off of what I went through and I write to keep my mind from caving in.  
> i'm @lilacskiesandroses on tumblr if y'all wanna come hang.  
> Stay safe cool cats and kittens!  
> -andie <3


End file.
